Where do I belong?

[LillyBean]

I feel like I don't fit in anywhere. I have been extremely vanilla most of my life. Then about 8 years ago I went through something like a mid-life crisis. During that time I became active in the bdsm community. However, I didn't feel like I fit in. I didn't like degredation. I don't like dressing in leather or being treated like a piece of meat. Romance and bdsm together seem like a rarity. I'm romantic and very vanilla in public. I've always had fantasies that involve me being treated as a child. I am a true submissive and love the D/s aspect of a relationship. I love when someone knows me enough to get into my head.

Anyway, it seemed that maybe where I belonged was the DD/lg. But not sure I fit here either. It seems that most daddies on this site only want women 18-24. Also, I'm not into sippy cups, coloring, cartoons. But I do feel emotionally like a 6-8 year year old at times. I love to be called little names. I love being taken care of cuddles and discipline. I'm new to this world and still exploring, any advise would be appreciated. Thanks for taking the time to read this scattering of thoughts.

[Guest]

I would not say you don't fit into dd/lg , there are no guild lines or rules to being little. So if you don't like coloring, sippy cups , ect it does not make you less of a little. Age is an issue for some (and remember this applies to all date/ relationships, not just dd/lg) but not all and remember is this is one site, there are tons more to find the right DD or mommy or whatever it is you are looking for. You could even try to find local bdsm events and maybe run into someone that's into dd/lg there, you never know. Anyways my point is you can make dd/lg whatever you want it to be and you should not give up.

Edited November 6, 2016 by Arya

[LillyBean]

Arya,

Thank you for taking the time to read and respond to my post. I guess it will just take some time to figure out what exactly I want and need.

[Guest LicklePrincess]

My advice would be don't rush it and definitely don't try to label yourself. The pleasure of being alternative I feel is about exploring and expressing yourself in a way that fits you.

 

You don't need a label or a name just enjoy what you enjoy. 

 

Our community is so diverse with so many people liking only select aspects of ddlg while others fulfill what would generally be understood as the typical "little" role.

 

Above all just be you and enjoy it, you are always welcome here irrelevant of your role or title.

[LillyBean]

Thanks Lickle, I agree with your advice. However, just by coming to this site I've already put a label on myself. I just don't understand what that label means to me yet.

[Guest GrapeApe]

I don't think there is anything unnatural about the feelings you have, or your desire to fit into the Dd/Lg community in some way.  But, it will take some trial & error, before you figure out exactly what the dynamic means, what people are looking for in little and bigs, and what you want exactly from a partner.

 

Give it some time, and maybe it will make more sense.  Try making some friends and talking to them. 

[Guest RedDragon]

I agree with everything already said. It's important to remember that your life will be ever changing and evolving and it's ok to be in a place that you cannot immediately define. You're a perfectly unique person and the energy you emanate will bring you closer to those who compliment you. I've often worried about age and I've discovered that age is not the problem. The worry is the problem!! Stay positive and love who you are and good things will follow.

[Guest tempest]

I had trouble when I first started trying to find my place as well. I'm thankful it came about and I hope that you find your place, but have fun getting there and that it fulfills you. <3

[ziva vlad's kitten]

I didn't feel like I fit in with BDSM ether, but I have grown to love DD/lg.

I hope you will find what you love too.

 

There was a thread a little while back for littles over 30, so not everyone here is 18-24. I thought you might like to see ot so here is a link.

 

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/4307-not-so-young-little-over-30-represent/?fromsearch=1

Edited November 6, 2016 by little ziva

[stargirl]

Arya,

Thank you for taking the time to read and respond to my post. I guess it will just take some time to figure out what exactly I want and need.

 

Great idea! There are tons of resources such as this one, and you can always post and ask questions