My Daddy confuses me?

[CandyAcid]

We've been together since I was 14 (he was 17 at the time) and now I'm 18, and I didn't tell him about me being a little until last year. I was hoping me acting like a little and being childish will help him realize it without me having to say it out loud, cause I'm really, extremely shy. Anyways, he says he's into it and he always has been, but I feel like he only enjoys being my 'daddy' when we're in bed. He also gets really annoyed when I act childish and talks to me like I'm dumb 24/7 and it really upsets me. But he swears he's into this.

 

I guess I'm just really confused because I don't want to leave him, we're about to move in together, but I can't really change who I am and I don't want to have to hide my little side just to make him happy...

[zzz]

1. Don't use moving in together as an excuse to stay together. If you're having problems now, moving in together is going to make all of those problems more complicated!

2. If he talks to you like you're dumb and he hasn't gotten explicit consent from you for it that's really awful behavior and it could even be classified as abusive depending on how/how often he does this. It's very undermining to your self worth and your mental well being!

3. These things aside, if you're bringing BDSM elements into your relationship (like ddlg) you really need to sit down and explicitly talk about each of your boundaries and what you want out of it. If he is only interested in being your daddy in a sexual context, it's unethical to expect him to be your daddy in any other context. If you need a daddy in other contexts it's unethical of him to agree to it and then only deliver in the bedroom. You guys really aren't getting what you need out of the relationship right now and the only way to fix this is clear and direct communication about it.

[Princess-P]

If your too shy to talk to him about what you want and expect then your not going to get anywhere with him. He may just be into Daddy kink. That's ok. If its not enough for you then that's a problem. However you can't expect him to be something he's not and it sounds like he's not Daddy material.

 

I would never tolerate someone talking to me like I'm stupid. Are you kidding? That's disgusting behavior and shows he has no idea how to treat someone hes supposed to care about.

 

If he isn't a Daddy then so be it. He doesn't have to be into it to be your partner. Doesn't have to participate in your little activities, you can do those alone.however if he can't accept you as you are regardless of his own interest or non interest... Then that's a huge problem and moving in together won't change that.

[Guest Prat]

That boy doesn't respect you.

[Guest Littlepup]

If you're not happy over and over again it could mean things aren't working out.

 

I entered a relationship when I was around 16 -17 and that boy swore up and down to everything and would do anything for me because he either loved me or didn't want to lose me. But after 6 years I ended it... I didn't want to because for a long time I was scared that nobody else would ever be so good to me, but again and again i found myself unhappy. and I ended it, prepared to never find a guy with those qualities that I did like. Except I surprised myself, I found a guy who was 10000000 times better than my ex and I've never been so in love. So the moral of the story is that sometimes even if nothing really bad is going on, it might just not be what you need to be happy.

 

Now this has less to do with you're bf and more to do with yourself. If you do realize that you are not happy in a relationship, make sure you know what you do want. No one is perfect, but you can still find someone who makes you happy even with their imperfections. 

[HeCallsMePrincess]

okay, I have to say one thing about this. you were 14, a very young teenager, and he was nearly a grown man. that to me is a red flag. I know i'll be told I'm wrong, and everyone is different, but that's my opinion based on being 14, 15 and dating much older boys/men.

[A Cuddly Dom]

I wouldn't expect anything substantial to come of this. I'm sorry, but he's still a child at that age and so are you. At the very least, you can see where the relationship is failing already. No matter your age, you should never allow someone to belittle you this way. He's immature and uncertain as to the role of being a daddy. If you want my honest advice, get out now, go on and have your fun as a young woman, and when you hit your mid twenties, get serious again. I hate to say it, but a man that's serious about settling down with his dream girl is in his early thirties these days. A man in his early twenties is not of the same mindset now. I'm an artifact of a time since past, as I was trying desperately to marry and have a home life when I was still young. We need our twenties to help us shape who we are as adults later. Believe me, you are going to change a lot in the next few years, but his bad behavior will not. Take heed.